Re: The Glorious Championship! [S3G5] [Round Two: The Kestalvian Rainforest]
07-30-2011, 03:36 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by Anomaly.
Gaurinn slowly pulled himself from the crushed remains of an enormous egg, head reeling. Taking a few moments to reorient himself, he found Cailean sprawled on the ground, lying completely still. He had somehow managed to avoid smashing any of the other four eggs, each of which was at least twice the size of his head.
"Cail, be useful for once in your life and get up."
Cail twitched a few times before he managed to mumble incoherently at Gaurinn.
"Cail, we only fell a few meters. Get the hell up. If you haven't noticed, I can't really go anywhere with you lying around like a fucking rock. At least the rock would be useful in a fight. Come on, get up!" Gaurinn picked up a large piece of eggshell and smashed it over Cailean's head, prompting the latter to stir.
"...Gaurinn? Ugh... What just happened?"
"In your infinite wisdom, you managed to walk off a cliff and fall into this nest. If I'm stuck to you, the least you could do is learn to tell the difference between ground and air. Hint: air is the stuff that isn't solid."
"Gaurinn, I don't think that was a cliff." With his remaining arm, Cailean pointed at a massive tree branch looming above them. A few patches of blue vomit were plainly visible closer to the enormous tree trunk nearby.
"So wait, we're... Cail, get off the ground and get me closer to the edge of this nest." The soldier obliged, dragging himself to the thick wall of twigs and branches at the side of the nest. Gaurinn crawled his way over the side and peered down, his multitude of eyes visibly widening immediately.
"What's wrong? Where are we?"
"Cail. We're at least a hundred meters above the ground. If that's even the ground I'm seeing and not just another fucking tree. You know what, let's just stay up here and wait for one of those idiots to get themselves killed."
"Are you sure we shouldn't find them? Some of them don't seem all that bad. Wouldn't want them to get killed, would we?"
"Cailean, sometimes I think you don't even listen to yourself. We get home once everyone else is dead, and unless you have a brilliant idea to escape from that asshole that brought us here and that shadowy... thing... Look, I'm sick to fucking death of this. One minute I'm about to be hailed as some kind of hero after finishing a critical mission and not even dying, and the next I'm next to a thing that looks like a human but isn't, who doesn't even explain anything to me and then tosses me into a parking lot.
"I try to figure out what's going on and before I know it, I've been reduced to your arm. A fucking arm! And before I know it, some shitface comes out of nowhere and shoves a metal arm into my mouth, and the arm immediately dissolves into some kind of disgusting metallic shit which forces its way down my throat, and then I wake up next to you in some kind of bar, and you tell me that I'm not even fucking alive apparently, and... Cail, are you even listening to me?" Gaurinn stopped his rant long enough to glance up at Cailean, whose gaze was fixed off in the distance. The centipede slowly lifted his body to see what was so interesting.
"Oh."
Towering above the pair was a massive creature, overall resembling a giant, green-black bird, but with features more reminiscent of a pterodactyl as well. From its beak extended a multitude of razor-sharp teeth, which it made no attempt to hide as it shrieked at them. Its four narrow, blue eyes glared with the ferocity of a predator out for the kill, firmly fixed upon the one-and-a-half figures in its nest. Its feathery wings, tipped in claws, spread to its sides in a needless attempt to appear more intimidating. Upon its feet were several large, deadly-looking talons, any one of which would likely have been enough to kill a man. And it had just noticed that one of its eggs had been destroyed by an unwanted intruder. It shrieked again, slowly drawing closer to Cailean and Gaurinn, intent on the kill.
A blinding arc of electricity struck the bird, stopping it in its tracks before it limply fell from the branch, hitting the ground with a thud a few seconds later. Gaurinn, entire body smoking, lifted himself to Cailean's eye level.
"You know what, new idea. I can't do that again without exhausting myself completely. Let's find a way to get down."
Gaurinn slowly pulled himself from the crushed remains of an enormous egg, head reeling. Taking a few moments to reorient himself, he found Cailean sprawled on the ground, lying completely still. He had somehow managed to avoid smashing any of the other four eggs, each of which was at least twice the size of his head.
"Cail, be useful for once in your life and get up."
Cail twitched a few times before he managed to mumble incoherently at Gaurinn.
"Cail, we only fell a few meters. Get the hell up. If you haven't noticed, I can't really go anywhere with you lying around like a fucking rock. At least the rock would be useful in a fight. Come on, get up!" Gaurinn picked up a large piece of eggshell and smashed it over Cailean's head, prompting the latter to stir.
"...Gaurinn? Ugh... What just happened?"
"In your infinite wisdom, you managed to walk off a cliff and fall into this nest. If I'm stuck to you, the least you could do is learn to tell the difference between ground and air. Hint: air is the stuff that isn't solid."
"Gaurinn, I don't think that was a cliff." With his remaining arm, Cailean pointed at a massive tree branch looming above them. A few patches of blue vomit were plainly visible closer to the enormous tree trunk nearby.
"So wait, we're... Cail, get off the ground and get me closer to the edge of this nest." The soldier obliged, dragging himself to the thick wall of twigs and branches at the side of the nest. Gaurinn crawled his way over the side and peered down, his multitude of eyes visibly widening immediately.
"What's wrong? Where are we?"
"Cail. We're at least a hundred meters above the ground. If that's even the ground I'm seeing and not just another fucking tree. You know what, let's just stay up here and wait for one of those idiots to get themselves killed."
"Are you sure we shouldn't find them? Some of them don't seem all that bad. Wouldn't want them to get killed, would we?"
"Cailean, sometimes I think you don't even listen to yourself. We get home once everyone else is dead, and unless you have a brilliant idea to escape from that asshole that brought us here and that shadowy... thing... Look, I'm sick to fucking death of this. One minute I'm about to be hailed as some kind of hero after finishing a critical mission and not even dying, and the next I'm next to a thing that looks like a human but isn't, who doesn't even explain anything to me and then tosses me into a parking lot.
"I try to figure out what's going on and before I know it, I've been reduced to your arm. A fucking arm! And before I know it, some shitface comes out of nowhere and shoves a metal arm into my mouth, and the arm immediately dissolves into some kind of disgusting metallic shit which forces its way down my throat, and then I wake up next to you in some kind of bar, and you tell me that I'm not even fucking alive apparently, and... Cail, are you even listening to me?" Gaurinn stopped his rant long enough to glance up at Cailean, whose gaze was fixed off in the distance. The centipede slowly lifted his body to see what was so interesting.
"Oh."
Towering above the pair was a massive creature, overall resembling a giant, green-black bird, but with features more reminiscent of a pterodactyl as well. From its beak extended a multitude of razor-sharp teeth, which it made no attempt to hide as it shrieked at them. Its four narrow, blue eyes glared with the ferocity of a predator out for the kill, firmly fixed upon the one-and-a-half figures in its nest. Its feathery wings, tipped in claws, spread to its sides in a needless attempt to appear more intimidating. Upon its feet were several large, deadly-looking talons, any one of which would likely have been enough to kill a man. And it had just noticed that one of its eggs had been destroyed by an unwanted intruder. It shrieked again, slowly drawing closer to Cailean and Gaurinn, intent on the kill.
A blinding arc of electricity struck the bird, stopping it in its tracks before it limply fell from the branch, hitting the ground with a thud a few seconds later. Gaurinn, entire body smoking, lifted himself to Cailean's eye level.
"You know what, new idea. I can't do that again without exhausting myself completely. Let's find a way to get down."