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+--- Thread: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 (/showthread.php?tid=1834)
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tronn - 02-07-2019
>Adler: Have you considered just directly contacting Duchess through scrying orb and elfmind? She definitely owes you a favor!
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - smuchmuch - 02-08-2019
>Hawk Lady be connected to Shela Na Gog , somehow. Or maybe not.
>Adler: Aright look like Jerry is distracted for a little while, shame you couldn'gt get him thrown into prison but this'll do if you make sure this will last one way or another.
>It seems aeven if he can't hear you, yur use of elfmind keeps making him more confused and crazier. Maybe something to take advantage of.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - El Santo - 02-11-2019
Hawk Femme: Gaze longingly into Jerry's eyes and imagine how wonderful those eyes would like outside of his head.
Jerry: There is a giant shoe that looks like a hawk staring into your eyes! Hug the shoe.
Hawk Femme: All according to plan
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tegerioreo - 02-14-2019
Quote:Lady Hawk, have plans for Jerry. Nasty plans...
>Hawk Woman: Suffice it to say, it's surprising you turned out to be a hawk instead of a "Black Widow".
>Adler: Aright look like Jerry is distracted for a little while, shame you couldn'gt get him thrown into prison but this'll do
Hawk Femme: Gaze longingly into Jerry's eyes and imagine how wonderful those eyes would like outside of his head.
Jerry: There is a giant shoe that looks like a hawk staring into your eyes! Hug the shoe.
Hawk Femme: All according to plan
0213badlove.gif
"Man, I don't like this," the bovine guard muttered as he and his colleague turned away. "How many husbands has she gone through?"
"Thirteen so far," the lupine guard whispered. "Once she gets her hooks into a guy, there's no hope for him."
"At least it's not anybody we know," the bovine guard remarked.
Quote:Adler: Finish your investigations first so you don't have to later.
I gathered from this that it would probably be safe (for me, at least) to leave Jerry in the feathery embrace of this she-raptor while I snooped around the town. I decided it would be best to investigate now, while I was here, rather than trying to come back later.
If the Duchess was involved, any further delay might have dire consequences!
Quote:a poster advertising a certain bevarage quite familiar to Adler.
0213drinke.gif
I noticed a poster stuck to a wall in an alley, advertising a famous Antglade beverage that had been outlawed by my grandfather.
Oh yes, the Duchess was definitely involved.
Was she merely peddling intoxicating drinks to the lowfolk, or did she have more sinister plans in the works? My mother had hinted at unguessable horrors when she had contacted me earlier.
Quote:Adler: While Jerry is being taken care of, spy in on a local forge to see what kind of strange technology these lowfolk have developed, be shocked and terrified as you see a strange metal tube weapon that destroys a target dummy from across the room!
I noticed a large mill building which was labeled as "O'Daisies Arms Foundry" and floated inside to investigate. Dozens of lowfolk at workbenches were assembling contraptions that looked like a crossbow combined with a trumpet. Had they discovered - and weaponized - a musical instrument even more diabolical than the baglute? I shuddered at the prospect .. but I had to know.
I followed a pushcart full of assembled devices through a passageway that was labeled "TESTINGE."
0213blaem.gif
There I beheld two very familiar skunks, and my blood ran cold.
Matholwch took one of the devices from the cart, poured a measure of what looked like birdseed into the trumpet, placed a pinch of powder into a tiny pan at the back, pulled back the catch, and aimed the instrument at a straw dummy across the room. The device let off a loud explosion, and the dummy was torn to shreds.
"I dunno bout this, Bodb," Matholwch sighed as he lowered the weapon. "Seems like to make killin' just a lil' too easy. Pert near takes all the fun out of it, I reckon."
Quote:>Adler: Have you considered just directly contacting Duchess
My heart was pounding. If the boy Dukes were here, the Duchess couldn't be far away! And they were mass-producing some sort of terrible doomsday weapon that could throw a shredding cloud of red-hot gravel at anyone who stood in their way! An army equipped with such weapons would indeed be a force to reckon with!
The Duchess owed me a favor, since it was I who had liberated her. I needed to get in touch with her so she could help free me from Edessa's imprisoning geas!
0213srcyed.gif
Suddenly Bodb grunted and pointed directly toward my hovering, supposedly invisible presence.
"FUMA'S SAKES!" Matholwch exclaimed. "We's bein' scryed on! There's only one scallywag I know of that could do that .. or not more'n two that'd even dare! That means he ain't as dead as we thought, nor as trapped as them Vulpy Vulps claimed he was! We gotta go tell Aunt Momma right now!"
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - typeandkey - 02-14-2019
>Adler: You've had your fair share of maneuvering through politicking machinations, this should be second nature to you. Tell the two to hold on for a moment and cut a deal.
>The Two Stooges: You may not have inherited your mother's intelligence, good looks, foresight, basic dexterity, or even sense of self preservation, but you have indeed inherited her sense of self-serving, malevolent ambition in spades. Suddenly latch onto the idea that a world ruled by Adler might have more benefits in store for you than a world ruled by your mother.
-OR-
>Adler: Become very, very annoyed to find out that the two inbred idiots are not talking about you, but none other than Glenholm Webb. Evidently, even though it is known you've survived, no one actually considers you a threat to any degree.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Tai-1 - 02-18-2019
(02-14-2019, 11:21 AM)typeandkey Wrote: ยป>Adler: Become very, very annoyed to find out that the two inbred idiots are not talking about you, but none other than Glenholm Webb. Evidently, even though it is known you've survived, no one actually considers you a threat to any degree.
I'm O.K. with this...
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - El Santo - 02-18-2019
">Adler: Become very, very annoyed to find out that the two inbred idiots are not talking about you, but none other than Glenholm Webb. Evidently, even though it is known you've survived, no one actually considers you a threat to any degree."
I second this
Adler: Start mouthing off at the two inbred hicks, actually hurt their feelings to the point where they cry
Matholwch: Start crying, years and years of bottled up emotions finally break from the mental Dam.
Bodb: Protect your brother, but also cry, you try to hold it back but Adler can see through your sniveling face.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tegerioreo - 02-21-2019
Quote:find out that the two inbred idiots are not talking about you, but none other than Glenholm Webb.
0220whisper.gif
"You're right, Bodb, buddy," Matholwch whispered, even though I hadn't heard Bodb say anything. "We best not disturb Aunt-Momma til we know for sure which meddlin' scallywag it is. Now play it cool, an' don't let on you know he's here. Who do you figure it is? Glenholm Webb, or Estvan Silverbrush?"
Quote:>Adler: You've had your fair share of maneuvering through politicking machinations, this should be second nature to you. Tell the two to hold on for a moment and cut a deal.
Adler: Become very, very annoyed
Adler: Start mouthing off at the two inbred hicks
0220harangue.gif
"It's neither of them, you morons!" I yelled. "This is Prince Adler, and I can't believe you've been here this whole time, setting up businesses and making yourselves comfortable while I'm trapped in Albric Tor just a few miles away!"
"Oh," Matholwch stammered. "Well, the thing is, we didn't think -"
"That's right, you didn't think!" I berated him. How dare he? "Never mind that it was due to my actions that you lot are free, and you owe me a huge favor, the hugest you've ever owed anyone, EVER. You idiots are too dumb to fathom what that kind of responsibility entails. You wouldn't know common elvish decency if you turned around and stubbed your toe on it! Even if it were possible to somehow combine the two of you, you'd still have less than half a brain! You boys are useless, absolutely useless! Where is the Duchess? I need to talk to an adult!"
Quote:Matholwch: Start crying, years and years of bottled up emotions finally break from the mental Dam.
Bodb: Protect your brother, but also cry, you try to hold it back but Adler can see through your sniveling face.
0220baww.gif
To my amazement, Matholwch began to cry. He clutched his brother-cousin for solace and blubbered up toward me, "TH-THAT AIN'T NICE, YER HIGHNESS. YOU D-DON'T GOTTA BE SO MEAN. ME AN' BODB CAN'T HELP IT."
"Oh come on, you big baby," I scoffed. "I've heard the Duchess say worse things to you."
"AUNT-MOMMA DOES IT CUZ SHE LOVES US," Matholwch wailed. "WHEN YOU SAY IT, IT JUST SOUNDS UGLY."
"What in tarnation is all that ruckus?" a familiar voice called from another room. "Are you boys CRYIN'?? What in the Netherhells is a-goin' on in there?"
"P-PRINCE ADLER IS SCRYIN' ON US AN' SAYIN' THE AWFULEST THINGS, AUNT-MOMMA, MA'AM," Matholwch sobbed.
"HE WHAT???" the Duchess bellowed.
0220knockback.gif
Suddenly a terrific Magickal force pushed me back, out of the foundry, out of Percysthorpe, and all the way out of the tree-shaped crack in the scrying tower's scryspace.
I lay on the floor for several minutes. I felt dizzy and my head was throbbing.
What just happened?
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - typeandkey - 02-21-2019
>What just happened? You just provoked the ire of motherly instinct, gnarled and twisted though it may be. Best to wait a while for her to cool down before asking/demanding favors. See if she contacts you.
>For now... Go and tell Ethel the good news! <dumb heart emoji repeated three times>
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tronn - 02-21-2019
>Make yourself presentable for the Duchess's visit. She's bound to come anytime soon, anytime soon...
>Gosh darn dagnabit what's keeping her so long!? Elfmind a polite but passive-aggressive message to her just in case she's snubbing you.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Major Matt Mason - 02-21-2019
>Ethel: Be pleased at the news, but...is Adler sure Jerry is finished?
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Torchfire - 02-21-2019
Duchess, note that if Adler became desperate enough to contact your sons-nephews, then he may want something from you. Decide to wait and see if he contacts you.
Matholwch and Bodb, have a long brotherly conversation about what happened. Experience some personal growth as a result.
Adler, start getting hungry again.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Kofiman - 02-22-2019
Adler: Get ready for the visit. You'll be properly impressive if you cook, so plan for that. Maybe you can gather up enough power to make a sunlit rock hot enough to act like a stove. See if you can arrange for some music.. maybe use grammarie to make some plants into a wind organ? And lastly, you don't have to be short compared to that lowfolk. Estvan said powerful elves could be whatever size they wanted, right?
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - El Santo - 02-24-2019
Ethel: Comfort your sister, but very superstitiously, because it would damage your street cred.
Adler: Upon seeing Ethel be the most kind and comforting femme in all the land, be even more entranced by her beauty!
Jerry: The giant shoe takes you to her tower, you find many torture implements, like the dreaded long division of doom! Not a machine that will cut you to ribbons, no she expects you to do math! Worse yet, Jerry you see a tax form, and she expects you to organize it, truly this is a fate worse than death. Also no shoes anywhere, there will never be shoes.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Major Matt Mason - 02-28-2019
>Ethel: You're awfully well informed, aren't you?
>Adler: Next time you get the chance, a closer magickal exam of Ethel might be in order.
>Adler: Time to break out the comb. Warning shots, if need be, but...
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tegerioreo - 02-28-2019
Quote:You just provoked the ire of motherly instinct, gnarled and twisted though it may be. Best to wait a while for her to cool down before asking/demanding favors. See if she contacts you.
>Make yourself presentable for the Duchess's visit. She's bound to come anytime soon
Adler: Get ready for the visit. You'll be properly impressive if you cook, so plan for that. Maybe you can gather up enough power to make a sunlit rock hot enough to act like a stove. See if you can arrange for some music.. maybe use grammarie to make some plants into a wind organ? And lastly, you don't have to be short compared to that lowfolk. Estvan said powerful elves could be whatever size they wanted, right?
I got up, dusted myself off, and began to think about what I needed to do to get ready for the Duchess's visit. Surely she would be coming soon, now that she knew I was still alive and trapped in Albric Tor.
Hmm ... come to think of it, she might be slightly upset with me for making the Boy Dukes cry. It was probably some sort of magickal force from her which forced me back to my scry tower. It would probably be best to arrange the fanciest Royal Reception I could manage, in order to soothe the Duchess's vanity and potentially improve her mood. I would need food - some of my famous stew would surely do the trick - and music, and it wouldn't hurt to make myself taller with some Glamour spell while I was at it.
To make stew, I would need ingredients! I could go tell Ethel that Jerry was disposed of, and ask her to bring me some food as a reward! My fur stood on end and I tingled with delight at the prospect of scrying Ethel again.
I stuck my head into the tree-shaped crack and whisked my thoughts toward Ethel's house.
Quote:Go and tell Ethel the good news!
>Adler: When you go to declare your success you scry in on Ethel comforting her sister Trudy who is in tears.
Ethel: Comfort your sister, but very superstitiously, because it would damage your street cred.
Adler: Upon seeing Ethel be the most kind and comforting femme in all the land, be even more entranced by her beauty!
0227consolamente.gif
When I got there, Ethel was consoling Trudy, who was in tears. What a kind and caring sister Ethel was!
"He's gone," Trudy sobbed. "And he didn't even leave a note. He took the money and a few days' provisions."
"He's a bastard, Trudy," Ethel murmured comfortingly. "You need to forget about him. I saw him leaving. He headed out to Percysthorpe."
"AGAIN?" Trudy wailed.
"I'm sure he's with that hawk hussy now, ruffling her feathers," Ethel hissed angrily. "At least until she kicks him out. You need to be strong. When he comes slinking back this time, you tell him NO. He can't just keep using people like this. Don't let him back in the house."
"AHEM," I said politely.
Quote:is Adler sure Jerry is finished?
0227whodat.gif
"WHO'S THERE?" Trudy squeaked.
"So you can hear him too..." Ethel murmured. "Last time it claimed to be your elf, Lord Randall."
"Sure'n who else would it be at all, at all?" I replied. "I bring ye good tidings, me fair lasses. That scurvy villain Jerry'll trouble ye no more!"
"How did you do it?" Ethel asked suspiciously. "Where's the body?"
"No body as yet," I chuckled. How adorably cunning she was! "But the lad has fallen into the clutches of a man-eating villainess."
"It wasn't Lady Hawk, was it? Because he's gone over there and 'married' her twelve t-"
Suddenly I was yanked away from Ethel's room and snapped back into my scry-space!
What in the Netherhells was going on?
I peeked into the crack again ..
Quote:Matholwch and Bodb, have a long brotherly conversation about what happened.
Adler, start getting hungry again.
0227burying.gif
.. and saw Matholwch sticking some strange shaggy object into a hole just outside the circle of stones.
"Aunt-Momma sure belted the Prince a whallop, didn't she?" Matholwch grunted. "Yessir, ol' Adler'll be out for hours after one o' Aunt-momma's prize whallops. An' when he wakes up he won't be a-scryin' nowhere outside his lil' ol' circle here, will he?"
Bodb made a sound that might have been a malevolent chuckle, or it might have been a sneeze.
"Yep, he's gonna be in for a surprise," Matholwch continued. "Just like he surprised us by still bein' alive an' all. How you figure he survived the Plague o' Battles?"
Bodb coughed wetly.
"You reckon? Shucks, I wouldn'a thought that lil' runt had it in him. Hey, this here hole ain't deep enough. Get back over here with that shovel."
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - typeandkey - 02-28-2019
>Adler: "Oh you scheming, conniving, dishonest, unseelie, oath-breaking, no-good, etc.-etc., bad people!"
>Adler: Shoot them! Shoot them and tie them up! You can interogate them after they wake up and you put the fear of Fuma in them.
>Ethel: "Uh, hello? You were saying? Oh for the love of... Take it from me Trudy, elves are stupid."
>Trudy: Have absolutely no idea what's going on.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - Kofiman - 02-28-2019
>Adler, Can you apport that shovel?
>Adler, you could just apologize.. yeah, they're being mean, but so were you.
>Adler: Be bad at apologizing, but luck into acceptable insults instead of unacceptable ones.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tronn - 02-28-2019
>Demand an explanation from those two nitwits. What are they doing? When the Duchess hears of this they'll be sorry!
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - smuchmuch - 02-28-2019
>Oh gee, it's almost the unseelies who hate hte mepire never planned on a prince of the eimpire getting on the throne.
> It's almost as if they never planned to have you survive using the P.O.B
>Gee its almost like you could have guessed that ealier and not revealed yourself to them.
>Realise you are an imbecile. You knew yourf 'aliance' with uchess was tenuous at best.
>Realise harder and smack your head for good measure
>Now go stop the inbred twins before they finish whatever they are doing. you're isolated enough as is, you can't loose scrying.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - El Santo - 03-03-2019
Bodb: It's gone, the shovel is gone, everything on your person is gone, you blinked and somehow it all disappeared, your shovel, clothes, naughty femme scrolls, money, everything your just that incompetent
Matholwch: Start thrashing your brother for losing the naughty femme scrolls, Fuma damn it you really wanted to read that new Vixens Gone Wild, Bodb your a failure
Adler: Be entertained for a moment, when you see these Unseelie morons kicking the crap out of one another
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - smuchmuch - 03-04-2019
>Oh hey here's an idea make sure they can't find their shovel, magick it away one way or another.
>Take whatever they were trying to burr while they are distractedy. If it can stop people from scrying maybe itll be handy for you.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tegerioreo - 03-07-2019
Quote:>Adler: "Oh you scheming, conniving, dishonest, unseelie, oath-breaking, no-good, etc.-etc., bad people!"
>Realise you are an imbecile. You knew yourf 'aliance' with uchess was tenuous at best.
So that was how it was, eh? I smacked my head in frustration. I should have known!
I should have known that the Duchess of Daisies and her kin were not to be trusted! Of COURSE she intended for me to perish in the Plague of Battles. Why else would she have given it to me? She knew my marrying her was an impossibility from the start, so her plan all along was to destroy the Empire so she and her Unseelie kin could be free to wreak havoc!
I didn't fully understand why they were here in the lowfolk world instead of in Faerie, but I suppose havoc was havoc no matter where you wrought it. With no High King on the throne in Albric Tor, there was nothing to stop the Duchess's evil ambitions!
But apparently she hadn't expected me to survive. My being alive posed a potential threat to her .. maybe .. if I could somehow contrive to be crowned and restore the Empire. Blast it, I gave myself away by approaching the Dukes at their foundry in Percysthorpe! I smacked my head again and cursed my stupidity. I had lost the element of surprise! So the Duchess must have sent these two imbeciles to .. do what exactly?
Quote:>Adler, Can you apport that shovel?
>Now go stop the inbred twins before they finish whatever they are doing. you're isolated enough as is, you can't loose scrying.
>Oh hey here's an idea make sure they can't find their shovel, magick it away
The object they were trying to bury must be some sort of scry-blocking charm. They intended to trap me here, completely cut off from all contact! I could not let that happen!
All of this ran through my mind in an instant, and almost reflexively I apported Bodb's shovel away from him.
0306topple.gif
With his leaning prop gone, the lanky Duke fell silently to the ground just as his brother-cousin turned to address him.
"Hey, nitwit," Matholwch snapped. "I SAID brang the shovel over here."
Quote:Bodb: It's gone, the shovel is gone
Matholwch: Start thrashing your brother
0306nappin.gif
"WHUT IN THE NETHERHELLS YOU DOIN' BOY?" Matholwch yelled as the sight of Bodb lying prone on the ground made its way slowly into his brain. "NAPPIN ON THE JOB? I swear you is the outright LAZIEST critter I ever seen! Whar's the shovel?"
Bodb lay face-down in the grass and didn't move.
"HOW IN TARNATION DO YOU LOSE A SHOVEL??" Matholwch screeched. "You had it a minute ago! What'd you do, eat it? Y'durn fool, that thar was my FAV'RIT shovel! I raised it from a pup, an' only just finally got it housebroke, an' now YOU gotta go off an' LOSE it just like that! I reckon maybe Adler was right about you, you IS absolutely useless! I'm a gonna learn you a thang or two 'bout takin' care of other people's property!"
Quote:>Adler: Time to break out the comb. Warning shots, if need be, but...
>Adler: Shoot them!
Adler: Be entertained for a moment, when you see these Unseelie morons kicking the crap out of one another
I quietly pooked down to the dolmen and readied my bow as Matholwch picked Bodb up by the scruff and propped him, sitting, against a tree.
"Git ready fer the whoopin of your life," Matholwch growled. "I'm madder'n a nest o' hornets, and you ain't a-gonna lick me this time, tough guy!"
I was tempted to watch them fight, mainly because I could not imagine how the seemingly catatonic Bodb could ever "lick" his kinsman .. but no, I had to make an example of them. Nobody crossed the rightful High King of Faerie, and if it was war the Duchess wanted, she would have it! I produced an arrow, nocked it, took careful aim, drew back the string, released ...
0306arrow.gif
and missed! How could I have missed at this range & in these conditions??
Matholwch turned slowly and looked at me as the arrow stuck, vibrating, in the tree trunk between the two Dukes' heads.
"Yer Highness," Matholwch groaned in what I hoped was terror. "Yer awake .. an' armed, I see. You ain't mad, are ya?"
Quote:>Demand an explanation from those two nitwits.
"Hold it right there, you scoundrels!" I yelled, producing another arrow and striding toward them. "You've got some explaining to do!"
0306retreat.gif
"I'll whoop you later, Bodb," Matholwch exclaimed. "Right now we gotta skedaddle!" He grabbed his brother-cousin by the hand and dashed away at an impressive rate of speed.
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - typeandkey - 03-07-2019
>Adler: The consequences of what you've just done begin to sink in. The Duchess is not going to be happy. At all. Fairly upset, even. It might be a good idea to look into putting some form of protection around the circle.
>Shovel: Matholwch wasn't kidding. It really is trained and house broken. It's enchanted in some way that makes it sapient. It bounces around and is all too happy to help you out as its new owner.
>Adler: ". . . Alright."
>Adler: Use your newly acquired magic shovel to fish that horrible thing out of the hole so you can scry again. You're going to need to plan your next moves carefully. It sounds like Jerry is still a threat and now the Duchess will be working against you.
>Adler: Muse that the Duchess's actions seem entirely to keep you from asking for your favor. It sounds like if you can get your demand to her, she won't have a choice. That's the tricky part, though, isn't it?
RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5 - tronn - 03-07-2019
>Shovelie: Looks like you're trying to dig a hole? Click F1 for help!