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Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Printable Version

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Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Ixcaliber - 07-23-2011

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> Be a doll

[Image: Dohlie.png]

You are now DOHLIE XPKJLZ and you are six sweeps old. Your chumhandle is universallyVenerated and so<3eti<3es it see<3s like al<3ost every troll you <3eet wants to beco<3e <3atesprits with you.

You are constantly being BOTHERED by people wishing to get all up in your FLUSHED QUADRANT. It is really quite a pain when your HEART belongs somewhere MUCH CLOSER TO HOME.

You have MAGENTA BLOOD but you're NOT A SEADWELLER because SEADWELLERS ARE LAME.

You were just talking to your LUSUS and MATESPIRT: HAXLEY, but someone is trolling you; undoubtedly pleading with you to enter a CONCUPISCENT ROMANCE with him.

You opt to take a look anyway.

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Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Robust Laser - 07-23-2011

Talking to RP didn't help, and in fact may have worried you even more than before. You decide to try telling gT straight-up that you can't talk to him. Like a man.

>Fail miserably at acting like a man.
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[Image: AAB.png]

Well that didn't help either. ...Hold on, you think you smell something. Something delcious. Covered in troll-cheese, troll-pepperoni, and troll-anchovies. But hold on a minute. There's another unmistakable and recognizable smell nearby.

[Image: AAC.png]

Blood! Oh no, Denolo.

[Image: AAD.png]

Oh no, the pizza!

What the- somebody is messaging you! This is the worst possible time for somebody to finally message you! You are in the middle of an emergency!

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Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - MaxieSatan - 07-27-2011

> Be the stupid hippy jackass
[Image: bluhpdate_1.jpg]
You oblige, though you're still very confused as to who and/or what that entails. Not to mention where you are, when it is, or why you're there to begin with. You definitely know how, though. The answer is, of course, your beloved SLURRY OF CALMING LEAFY GREENS AND HALLUCINOGENIC ACIDIC SUBSTANCE.

Anyway you guess you better to this WEIRD GREEN GHOST FUCKER.
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Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - SleepingOrange - 07-31-2011

>Be that toned piece of trollmeat

[Image: trollstuck4.png]
The conversation with JIGGLES having gone about as well as it could, you finally manage to make it out of your hive. It feels like it took days, but that's probably just because Lard's stupid double-letters take FOREVER to read. And anyway, READING IS HARD.

You breathe a HEALTHY, MASCULINE LUNGFUL of fresh evening air. It's a little weird that nobody else is out in your lawnring, given how early and pleasant it still is, but some of your neighbors have taken to locking themselves in their hives when you're around. THEIR LOSS, BABY. You saunter along, making sure to WORK THE GOODS and waiting for some kind of faster transport to present itself. Despite your DOUCHECHAT VISOR, something above you catches your eye.

[Image: Trollstuck5.png]
That's weird. There are a few flashes and streaks of light appearing and disappearing across the sky. You GRUNT MANFULLY as you try to remember what this means... Several seconds of intense REMEMBAFYING later, it clicks. They're meteors! It's a METEOR SHOWER.

...

...

Wait, meteors are big flaming rocks that fall from space, right? You respond to this revelation in the only reasonable way possible.

[Image: Trollstuck6.gif]

"AAAUGH HOLY SHIT THE SKY IS FALLING THE SKY IS FALLING!"

[Image: Trollstuck7.png]

You waste no time in charging towards the nearest hive (you don't even remember whose it is and don't have time to spend REMEMBAFYING something so unimportant) and punching the door in. Like hell you're going to get caught with a bunch of FLAMING GODDAMN SPACEROCKS falling on your head and crushing such a perfect specimen of TROLLHOOD. Bits of door go flying, and by some tiny chance, your shouting and punching and breaking and entering attract the attention of the hive's OCCUPANT.

[Image: Trollstuck8.png]

It doesn't occur to you to wonder what kind of WEIRDO keeps their RECUPERACOON in their front room; all you can think is that maybe this METEOR SHOWER isn't going to ruin your night after all.

Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Solaris - 08-04-2011

It is now that we take this time to see another troll, one who for all intents and purposes couldn’t care less about the grander workings that are occurring, but will of course be forced to join in. Let’s see what was that name again...

>Sollar Lairis
[Image: RVGsc.gif]

Ah yes, you are SOLLAR LAIRIS, and you are, as usual, EXTREMLY DEPRESSED, but sort of OKAY WITH IT.
From the moment of your birth, you had these FREAKISH HORNS which are said to actually kill the mother grub that spawned you. It is because of this, and VARIOUS OTHER ASPECTS, that you are believed to be the RENCARNATION of The Messsiah, TROLL JEGUS. As a result, you are a frequent target of the empire and are MARKED FOR DEATH, in fact, it is almost as prevalent as your UNWWANTED LOVE AND ADORATION.
“Luckily”, you are (at least temporarily) SAFE FROM HARM, thanks to the protection of the Empress-to-be, FEFERI PEIXIS.
While your aforementioned horns (which have since been COMPLETELY SAWED OFF(YET ANOTHER SIGN)) and ULTRA-VIOLET blood are both marks of the SECOND COMING, you are skeptical, in part because you are TROLL JEWGISH, and while you believe that he was a good man, and that he was an important prophet, Troll Jegus was NOT A MESSSAIH.
Additional “proof” of your status as a SECOND COMING are your RARE PAIR OF WINGS and your VISON FOURTEENFOLD. However, you see them both as HIDEOUS DEFECTS, as the wings GET IN THE WAY of everything and your MANY PUPILS leave you IRONICALLY BLIND, which to some, FURTHER PROOVES your so called DESTINY as the SAVOIR OF TROLLKIND. Your life is terrible!
Your trolltag is untimelyUltimatum and you 5ype as penest as somrome whocsn/t see cqn.


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[Image: n3RdV.gif]

You are currently sitting around and hoping that nothing bothers you until the day that you die.
Oh look, someone is trying to contact you.
[Image: YJyZo.gif]
Aw shit.

>Answer troll-log.
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>Worry.
[Image: lKpZX.gif]

Oh god you are more terrified than a lost puppy... but at the same time, happy that this hell of a life is going to be over...

Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - MalkyTop - 08-04-2011

> Can we go back to being that useless lump of troll flesh already?

Yes you can.

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Uh oh.

You don't actually like talking to this person. She's sort of...loud. And scary. And she says a lot of mean words, though you sort of think she doesn't really realize it. Or mean it. Or something? Whatever the reason she says those words, you censor them out in your mind.

Well, better see what she wants.

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You can no longer be the useless lump of troll flesh.

Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Pick Yer Poison - 08-04-2011

> Ilene: Venture forth for shopping.

[Image: scrub5.png]

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Oh look, it's your lusus! He's, like, the most adorable unicorn ever!

[Image: scrub8.png]

But for some reason he always refuses to lend you money. It's hard to get your groove on without any cash.

[Image: scrub9.png]

Whoops, seems you're getting a call. Sorry daddy, you've gotta take this!

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What a sweetie. Now, to find that game disc!

Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - MaxieSatan - 08-05-2011

> Fabuloso: Inquire as to purpose of SE's interference

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Re: Trollstuck 2: The Saga Continues [likely NSFW] - Ixcaliber - 08-05-2011

> Aghaz: Wake up!

[Image: dreamtits.png]

You wake yourself up because you were getting concerned that that punch to Tal's face might actually wake up his dreamself. You can't let him find out about your dreamselves. thAt would be A fucking disAster.

[Image: dreamtal.png]

Luckily he's still sleeping soundly. You decide to make sure he stays that way...