Ed Wrote:DANCE

The siren call of your ringtone compels you to do a poorly-animated but very energetic dance. You spend enough time on this that the call goes to voicemail.

Dragon Fogel Wrote:Answer your shirt.

Perhaps that's for the best, though; someone's ranting about how it took a month for an upgrade that they hate and that fucked them over completely, and it sounds like you have about fifty other voicemails...

You begin to suspect that having your PHANTOM ZONE DOPPELGANGER pick up the slack after the first delay was unwise.

Pinary Wrote:Get ye flask.

Anomaly Wrote:Check out the DNA Lantern.

It appears to be some sort of strange lava-lampy thing. You decide that you might as well take it with you, if only because it seems more practical than the giant pocketwatch or mysterious floating eyeball.


It is promptly compressed and added to your MS PAINT ADVENTURES INVENTORY SOLUTIONS-BRAND MINIDEX℠. It's kind of shitty and ruins all the items you put in it - for example, that lamp is now permanently transfigured into some unidentifiable slash-like object with a little shiny bit. But you gotta support the brand, y'know?

Anyway, you should probably figure out what happened to the forums and fix it...

Dragon Fogel Wrote:Have a staring contest with the eye.

Ha! It better watch out, because you're the MSPA Staring Champ two years running.


Unfortunately, it "watches out" a bit too literally. You guess it's pretty used to staring at things, since that's apparently the only entertainment in this shitty excuse for a dimension.

Crowstone Wrote:put everything else in your inventory too

That'll teach that eyeball that nobody messes with you. It and the watch have been added to your inventory as TWO KINDA UNOWN/FISH-LOOKIN' THINGS. You get the background in there too, for good measure.