the awwful fantroll quirk thread

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SpoilerTM: i SHOULD have KNOWN BETTER
TM: of COURSE i STILL had it i AM SHIT at GETTING rid of THINGS

AR: so of corS I hav 2 stA true 2 my unst8ed wrd hEr
AR: & actually GIV dem Ech a go

FS: :D using my rule 8 immunity whic:h I totally haven't been waiting all :Day for!!!!!!
FS: :D just so that I c:oul:D make a post exac:tly like this!!!!!!

DG: 1 mean h0nestly m0st 0f these s1x h0ld up relat1vely well
DG: there's n0th1ng t00 1lleg1ble am0ngst them, bar maybe aR's

IC: Saying that, this one is tearrible and tea be frank whilst tea idea is nice and all...
IC: ...it's so puerhfectly teanage Sruix and I oolonger want tea try and think abouteat.

PE: And huh.
PE: ...
PE: These trolls don't have names.
PE: ...
PE: They have handles, though.
PE: ...
PE: Which I'll reveal at the end.
PE: ...
PE: Probably.

-~-~-~-~-~-~

II: |And then a few months later I decide trolls are becoming overused=
II: =which I must say was uncharacteristically prescient of me|

JJ: and so man do i get me a awfly good idea, ya hear?
JJ: and yeah turns out not ackshly groundbreakin or anything but still
JJ: i thought it cool, OK?

KK: I could make a world-ending-bad-game picture-story with a surprise-idea.
KK: It would start as usual, with the players and the game being brought up as you would expect.
KK: Though it would be made clear that these were normal kids with parents and families.
KK: And no thing-storing problems! How funny!

LL: aolas thaeas eisetgh platyes wpiould beat schpol;feinsds adn thsuej geaptogapojlly scevlo
LL: prsetsjntg somteihsng of a challeengae oecn teah mtesihosers staetised faalmjingg

UU: But these despicable weaklings would have acquired the game from an unlikely ally.
UU: A traitor, objectively speaking.
UU: Someone known to these wretched imbeciles only through the Information Superhighway.
UU: And of whom they knew very little in the way of personal information.

VV: I was NOT a traitor! That's just mean!
VV: But you are right! I did make contact with someone when I wasn't supposed to!
VV: They're really sweet, though! I made a friend!
VV: And of course I had to introduce them to all my other friends! You know who I mean!
VV: YOU GUYS!!
VV: Also, they did know some things!
VV: Like our names!
VV: Our not at all suspicious six-letter names!
VV: Which just happened to begin with the same letter doubled-up in our handles!

WW: Soooooooo yeah, back on point: the story's trying to insinuate the standard thing~
WW: Hoping that the kerfuffle of entry would be the draw to the stoooooooory~
WW: Buuuuuuuut~
WW: The players in the story would be entering at the same time as uuuuuuuus~
WW: So when things got tough we'd be screaming at each otheeeeeeer~

XX: but we bth fuckin fuck shit up
XX: dem cuz dey be idiotz
XX: we cuz r space player cs some shit in the fuckin cloudz
XX: gets the wrong idea
XX: n trys to break r shit
XX: lk geez UU get yo act tgthr
XX: xept u talkd me ovr so w/e
XX: we r so fucked

YY: [culmynatyng yn a double twyst]
YY: [that yn any hygh-qualyty experyence would have been delyvered yn a flash]
YY: [but thys ys me y'm talkyng about]
YY: [so the byggest possyble jump would have been from a spryte comyc to somethyng "properly" drawn]
YY: [whereby yt ys revealed yn a flash-forward that the "trolls" are yn fact the player's ancestors]
YY: [who thanks to a combynation of gross neglygence and Dersyan ynterference]
YY: [were bundled ynto the lotus and sent to post-Reckonyng Earth, where they were raysed by exyles]
YY: [thus solvyng that mystery and also provydyng ample opportunyty for thyngs to get fyxed by ynvokyng tyme shenanygans wyth the lotus]
YY: [synce y guess thys was about the tyme when yt was yntroduced yn comyc and y thought yt was ynterestyng]

ZZ: }REGARDLEZZ, TWIZT TWO WAZ THAT THERE WERE TWO OTHER PEOPLE TO BE TALKED WITH{
ZZ: }WHO I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT UNTIL ABOUT AN HOUR AGO AND OH MY GOZH I SEPARATELY HAD THE CHERUB IDEA{
ZZ: }EXCEPT MINE WERE ANGELZ BECAUZE THAT WAZ WHAT WE HAD TO PLAY WITH IN THE CANON{
ZZ: }AND THE ONLY REAZON I THOUGHT OF THEM IF MEMORY ZERVEZ WAS BECAUZE I HAD TWO LETTERZ OF THE ALPHABET LEFT TO FILL{
ZZ: }A-H BEING "GUARDIANZ" AND M-T BEING THE PLAYERZ{
ZZ: }BEYOND ZUGGEZTING THAT THEZE GUYZ WERE RESPONZIBLE FOR THE TIMING FUCK UPZ AND THE ORIGINAL COPIEZ OF THE GAME I NEVER DEVELOPED THEM{
ZZ: }BECAUZE I GAVE UP ON THE IDEA ZOON AFTERWARDZ WHEN I REALIZED I COULD NOT PULL IT OFF{
ZZ: }GO FIGURE{
ZZ: }THOUGH I MUZT HAVE TOYED WITH IT OCCAZIONALLY BECAUZE ZOMEWHEN KK AND LL CHANGED QUIRKZ AND LOTZ OF CLAZZPECTZ CHANGED{
ZZ: }AZ THE TOP OF THIZ ZPREADZHEET DOEZ NOT MATCH THE BOTTOM{
ZZ: }ZO ACTUALLY NONE OF THEZE QUIRKZ ARE TROLL QUIRKZ ZINCE NONE OF THEZE TEN ARE TROLLZ{
ZZ: }EH{