(06-25-2019, 08:30 PM)Schazer Wrote: »Check Hell Craig's'list for any interesting beseechings by mortals looking for deals with devils

Haha look at all these bozos looking for wishes! You absolutely cannot wait to monkey's paw the heck out of them!

You pretty much accept all of them, you've been pretty behind on your soul quota lately.

(06-25-2019, 07:20 PM)ProfessorLizzard Wrote: »>Oh no... the summoning circle...

AWW NUTS YOU TOTALLY FORGOT THAT ACTIVATES THE HELL PORTAAAAAAAAAAALL

(06-26-2019, 02:22 AM)Reyweld Wrote: »>The angel writes down their current feelings in their journal with the completely in place and not out of the ordinary pencil

Dear Diary,

Today someone was mean to me social media. 0 :c
But that's okay! I'm sure they were just having a rough day!
I hope the rest of their day is stress free and a good time! 0 :)

Sincerely yours,
Angel



Now that you think about it, it is kind of weird that this pencil doesn't fit into your carefully managed colour scheme, you wonder where you got it from?





0 :O!

>_

(06-30-2019, 06:44 PM)ProfessorLizzard Wrote: »>Oh no! You must return it in person...

(06-30-2019, 08:49 PM)Schazer Wrote: »Angel: Finish up all your other paperwork for the eon, then embark on a quest to hell to return this pencil

(07-01-2019, 08:51 AM)Numbers Wrote: »

(06-30-2019, 06:44 PM)ProfessorLizzard Wrote: »>Oh no! You must return it in person...

This involves first paragliding down to the earth from however high up, then using ANGELIC SUPER SENSES to find the owner. Pretty easy when you think about it. Sort of.

Well the only reasonable thing is to return it! You equip your HOLY PARAGLIDER.

Even though it's kinda redundant, what with the whole having wings thing.

It's gonna be a long trip to Hell! First, you gotta go to Earth.

(06-30-2019, 08:49 PM)Schazer Wrote: »Devil: Well this is embarrassing but you should get the job done you signed up for. Go find Guy and get him a dream job

Ah jeez. You put in all this effort to be menacing and intimidating and then you fall on your butt like a dunce.

Whatever, gotta save face.



"HEY! Which one of y'all is Guy? or Joan? Or Skrungus or whatever you Humans all have stupid names!"



"I'm Guy."

Oh. Well. That was easy.



"So the internet tells me you have a dream job Guy..."



"Oh, yeah. I always wanted to be, like, in the film industry? Not someone SUPER important but, like, sorta high up, y'know. Like a miniboss or something."



"HMMMMMMM And are you willing to trade your Soooooooooooul for this???"



"..."



"Yeah, okay."

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

How will you totally screw over this guy's wish?

_>

(07-06-2019, 08:27 PM)Arcanuse Wrote: »>Get them to sign the contract first, and then...
>Hand them a camera and say "Welcome to the wide, wonderful world of film-photography. Not taking photographs in far off locales, no. No, what you do is go in, and clean old cameras for people who somehow have far duller lives than you. That's right, you don't even get to look at their pictures of far off exotic locales. You will forever be haunted by the sheer number of people who find grey boring architecture worth taking fifty pictures of."
>Lean in, whisper: "And sometimes, if you're reaaaally lucky? It's a different wall."
>"You start Monday. Have fun."
>Poof back to hell, and chuckle malevolently, because today is Monday and they aren't at their new job! Bwah-hah-hah-hah.

(07-07-2019, 03:36 AM)Schazer Wrote: »He'll enjoy five or so years of being an assistant director etc on some critically acclaimed films, but then the accolades will get to his head and he'll direct his own thing that becomes so famous his full time career becomes "famous person" and he never has time to make films anymore. The

(07-10-2019, 10:36 PM)ShiningKatana Wrote: »wait wait wait.... fuck he DID use his soul already! gave it to a fucking unlicensed demon :( dont grant him his wish PERIOD